Hooligans, Hotties and Clairvoyant Cephalopods

The 2010 Soccer World Cup came to an end on Sunday night and I must say I have mixed feelings about the series. Let me state for the record that soccer is not my cup of tea. I like to see a result in my sporting contests and quite frankly, I find the concept of watching two hours of too-ing and fro-ing for a nil all draw rather boring. It is no wonder that there are riots. Sitting in the stands all day, drinking warm beer and leaving drunk and frustrated is bound to result in a case of ‘The English Disease’. Its not just the yobbos from the UK who wield the wooden cosh. Over the years there have been fighting in Argentina (Cordoba – 2002 World Cup), Italy (Rome – 2004, Turin – 2007), Belgium (Brussels – 1985), Ireland (Dublin – 1995), Switzerland (The Disgrace of Basel – 2006), France (Bordeaux – 2008), Russia (Moscow – 2002 World Cup), Germany (Dortmund – 2006) and many, many more. Even Australia has had issues although not as violent as those stated above.

Hooliganism.

Hooliganism goes way beyond spontaneous riots. Clashes between rival gangs, or ‘Firms’ as they are known, are often organised to take place at pre-arranged locations. Wikipedia has a list of Hooligan Firms from around the world http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_hooligan_firms some of whom have featured in literature and movies about organised soccer violence such as Ultrà in 1990 and The Football Factory in 2004.

There is plenty of debate as to what makes a soccer hooligan. Certainly alcohol plays a part but it is not always the main contributor. Racism has been blamed by many sections of the media whilst others have suggested that confrontational policing has fueled the fires – see the Football Industry Group fact sheet published by the University of Liverpool.

Some have also proposed that the “game of football has been associated with violence since its beginnings in 13th century England.”- Social Issues Research Centre UK. But does that make it right, or even acceptable?  I’m not claiming to have the answers but perhaps a simple widening of the goal mouth to allow some points to be scored might help. A little less theatrics by some of the players might improve the spectacle as well (hands up all those who think Tim Cahill looks like a twat when he spars against the corner flag after scoring a goal?).

Thankfully this type of antisocial behaviour is on the decrease (fan related violence that is, not the ham acting) and in spite of my obvious prejudices toward the game I do have some memorable soccer moments.

Paul the Psychic Octopus Picks The Next Winner

My top four would be:

1.) When my son kicked his first goal in the Pagewood FC Under 10s. Steve Martin’s performance in Parenthood had nothing on my sideline antics that morning. They went on to win the grand final that year and I got to run the lines.

2.) The afternoon I spent with my brother-in-law in a noisy Berlin pub as the local team lost narrowly to the visitors. Although there was not much English spoken the atmosphere was warm, the locals friendly and the beer was fragrant and flat – with a somewhat serious kick 😉

3.) I was there at Telstra Stadium in 2007 when David Beckham bent one in from the corner to score his only goal in Australia. More than 80,000 people witnessed that moment and watched as Sydney FC went on to beat LA Galaxy 5 – 3.

4.) Australia’s performance at the 2006 World Cup where we showed the world that we can do more that supply talent to the European sides.

The 2010 Highlight Reel

For me the 2010 competition highlight reel offered a lot of excitement and intrigue accompanied by the deafening hum of vuvuzelas and an octopus with the foresight of Nostradamus.

I say ‘highlight reel’ because with Australia beginning our campaign on the back of a 4 nil drubbing by the Germans (with some questionable refereeing I must add), well my resolve to get up at 4:30 in the morning was somewhat diminished (Don’t give me that look. I have a family and small children don’t care if daddy was up all night watching television.)

I loved the pinball style effort from Denmark when they scored the first ‘own goal’ of the tournament and I’m sure that when Maicon slotted that beauty against North Korea from such an obtuse and impossible angle the streets of Rio erupted into an impromptu Carnivalé.

Diving is still a big factor in the game. The Italians did it to the New Zealanders in a display reminiscent of Fabio Grosso’s famous penalty against Australia in 2006. In both instances the southern hemisphere sides were robbed of victories. In my opinion this is blatant cheating and its about time that FIFA implemented a video review system.

Penalties played a major factor for many sides. Asamoah Gyan hit the crossbar in extra time, which resulted in Uruguay wining the eventual shoot out 4 -2. However, the most devastating penalty was the one that put Paraguay out of contention and Larrisa Riquelme, the model with the remarkable mobile phone pouch who promised to run naked through the streets if Paraguay won, was let off the hook.

Larissa Riquelme

But it was Iniesta’s solitary Spanish goal in the 116th minute of the final that was the most climactic. It was not a particularly fancy strike of the ball but the lead up was superb. The Dutch had defended well all day and showed no signs of cracking despite Spain having some eighteen shots at goal. Frustration must have taken its toll though as their play became more niggling and spiteful which drew nine yellow cards and an eventual send off for John Heitinga midway through the extra period. As Spain held the trophy high Nelson Mandela appeared on the field, putting a familiar face to South Africa’s national pride as Shakira ‘Waka Waka-ed’ her backside along with hundreds of other performers at the closing ceremony.

Unfortunately the Socceroos average of one win, one loss and one draw was not good enough to qualify but I was very impressed by the kiwis three draws for their first ever visit to soccer’s world stage.  The All Whites have gone from unknowns to heroes with an undefeated World Cup campaign. I for one would love to see a regular match between the All Whites and the Socceroos played yearly in a style akin to the Bledisloe Cup. Surely this would boost the competitiveness of both sides leading into 2014.

One final comment, I hope you all will spare a thought for the 74 people killed by terrorists in Uganda as they watched the World Cup final. This is a despicable, cowardly act perpetrated by the lowest form of humanity.

Viva España!

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Social Media Commentary

Should you be embracing social media?

There’s no argument that social media sites such as Facebook, Twitter, YouTube, WordPress etc are growing in popularity day by day but to what extent are Australians getting involved? According to Nielson’s 2010 Social Media Report released in March there were 9 million Australians interacting regularly via social media with Facebook as the main platform. Twitter’s audience expanded by more than 400% in 2009 but perhaps the most important statistic to come from this report is that nearly two in every five online Australians are interacting with companies via social networking sites.

So who’s out there?

The ABC News site reported in February that Australians were leading the world with an average of seven hours per month spent on social media sites. Source ABC News

Nielsen’s online site NielsenWire noted in March 2010 that mobile social networking was predominantly used by the 35 – 54 age group (36%) and the 25 – 34 age group (34%) with a further 16% of participants in the 18 – 24 bracket. Source NielsenWire blogsite

That’s a lot of disposable income investing their time online.

Print budgets shift to social media.

AdNews reported in April that almost half (47%) of businesses have shifted marketing spend from print to social media. The online survey of 347 Australian businesses found 70% intend to conduct some form of social media activity this year, compared with just 40% in 2008. And it is not only print taking the hit. The survey found significant proportions of businesses are diverting funds to social media from direct marketing (33%), online/digital (26%), TV (15%) and radio (14%). Twenty-one percent of big businesses and 40% of SME’s will expand their marketing budgets in 2010 specifically to fund social media. “In the past year, there has been substantial growth in the number of consumers engaging with companies via social media,” Nielsen online research director Melanie Ingrey said. Australians lead the way in social media adoption with 86% reading online consumer product reviews and 75% belonging to some form of social media. Two-thirds (61%) of businesses already use social media to achieve brand building, however, 29% do not measure ROI from social media activity or don’t know how to. This lag in measurement is a barrier to entry for many businesses, however Ingrey said it is an “easy fix” and predicts a huge rise in adoption rates of social media in the next year. Source: AdNews Online, 21 April 2010

Social Networking On The Road

The Australian newspaper reported on June 8th that global smartphone shipments are tipped to more than double in the next four years from 246.9 million in 2010 to 506 million in 2014. Apple reported on June 22nd that they had sold over 3 million iPads in 80 days. Source Australian IT and Apple.com

The exponential uptake in mobile technology will have a profound effect on the way products and services are researched and consumed.

“Incredibly, nearly nine in ten Australian Internet users (86%) are looking to their fellow Internet users for opinions and information about products, services and brands, and Australians’ engagement with online word of mouth communication is going to increase in coming years as social media plays an increasingly important role in consumer decision making” states Melanie Ingrey, Research Director for Nielsen’s online business. Source NielsenWire article Australia Getting More Social Online as Facebook Leads and Twitter Grows.

The proliferation of smartphones has lead to a surge in mobile social networking. Nielsen’s report found that over one quarter of social networkers (26%) participated in mobile social networking in the past year. Facebook is the most popular site accessed via a mobile (92% of mobile social networkers have visited Facebook), followed by YouTube, Twitter (18%) & MySpace (9%). However, Twitter sees the most frequent mobile usage, with half of its mobile users visiting the site daily. In comparison, Facebook saw 36% of its mobile users visit the site daily, while 22% of MySpace users and 16% of YouTube users were making daily visits.

Back to the question, should businesses be embracing social media?

With almost 7,750,000 wage earning Australians currently engaged in some form of social media the answer for most people should be a resounding ‘yes’. Like all marketing activities though, you need to develop a strategy. Make sure you ‘tweet’, ‘blog’ and update your Facebook status regularly. Set measurable objectives such as increasing traffic to your website or improving your ranking in search engines. Share your news, views and knowledge with your audience, don’t just go for the hard sell. Most importantly, be honest. The global social network is an incredibly large organism and the old adage that ‘bad news travels fast’ is especially relevant.

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Booralee

Booralee

The early morning dew twinkled from the orb weaver’s web like a thousand tiny rhinestones in a disco cowboy’s jacket. The remnants of last night’s meal hung lazily by a single sticky strand, the mummified remains no longer resembling a fat and juicy moth. With grey clouds threatening to disgorge their voluminous contents the ants scurried about in a frantic attempt to dissect their breakfast, a long brown earthworm that was too early for the birds.

The gentle precipitation that sprinkled softly onto the grass failed to dampen the Magpies spirits as the monochrome marauders perched low in the tree, daring each other to steal a sausage from the sizzling grill. Brightly coloured Rosellas argued with the Rainbow Lorikeets for a space on the dry branches and the old mother possum discreetly moved her babies to a safer place in the hollow trunk.

Pig flesh popped and spattered while the blunt butter knife scratched it’s wad of low-fat yellow chemicals over freshly toasted bread and the noise of human chatter began to drown out the gentle sounds of nature. Children, in jumpers as garish as any parrots plumage, gathered in giggling groups as the lone adult fruitlessly explained once again the importance of protecting the little leather ball.

The ants hid deep in their hole.

Load, colourful humans continued to invade the solace. One by one their large metallic pets arranged themselves in symmetry whilst simultaneously belching forth a poisonous stench that overwhelmed the aroma from the greasy hotplate. The magpies gargled in derision at the offensive mammals as the cacophony of verbal pleasantries and mobile ring tones silenced the Lorikeet’s debate.

The baby possum coughed.

Pointed, leafless weapons of mass destruction tore at the spider’s home, dispersing the sparkling jewels and dislodging the Bogong’s coffin. Hairlike threads, for their weight as strong as steel, repelled the assault as best they could until a third of the arachnid’s masterpiece became adhered to the toddler’s hand. His mother led him away. Admonishing the little boy in a high pitched squawk, not for the carnage that was wrought upon the orb weaver’s home, but for the dog faeces squished into the grooves of his shoes.

Then, as the little pea splintered and exploded from the tin whistle, nature left Booralee.

For hours on end herds of multicoloured minions battled their way up and down the paddock. Sauce splattered, eggs shattered and the empty bottles of isotonic sports water choked the over crowded bins. Orange slices, lightly seasoned with grass clippings and sand, were consumed in vast quantities. Adults questioned the pea blower’s decisions as the clash of tiny bodies brought forth tears and cheers.

Mechanised noise from the soulless devices increased throughout the day. Water churned and spat from large silver drums and was mixed with the dust from ground brown beans. Translucent sarcophagi regurgitated a cooling mist as they displayed their gruesome contents of ground beef, reconstituted fowl and flavoured bovine excreta. But it was the digitised plastic receptacle that was kept busy the most. Constantly expelling its tongue to eat the paper and tin offered to it in exchange for the goodies stored in the human’s den.

Gradually the clatter began to subside.

Autumn leaves of yellow, red and orange danced in the breeze with the chocolate wrappers and empty chip packets. The round-footed flatulent beasts broke wind once more as they departed and, finally, the electronic commotion ceased.

With the sun dipping well below its zenith, nature began its migration back to Booralee. The ants had found a new prize in the discarded sausage skins and bacon fat. Their queen would feast tonight. Old mother possum had graciously accepted some sweet Valencia from a generous little girl with only a small nip and a slightly bloody finger as payment. The Lorikeets and Rosellas returned to their nests fat and happy from a banquet of nectar and the fruits of the nearby date palms; and the Magpies laughed at the flightless four-wheeled Falcon that was caked in seeded excrement. With the temperature dropping the orb weaver left his sanctuary under the paperbark and began repairing his web.

All was back to normal at Booralee, at least until tomorrow.